Monday, February 8, 2010

The Beginning of the Numismatists.

All hail Numis.

The lord Numis was born of the original Numismatist...Mattholamew. Through the trials of his life, Mattholamew attained enlightenment among the meeses. Having lived among them for centuries and studying the ancient lore of coins, he was blessed by nature herself. Upon his departure bestowed his essence into a tiny moose, birthing her from his own bosom...he named him Numis.

Even as a small moose, Numis' spirit contained within the monstrous antlers, a symbol of the power and knowledge attained by the moose god. as a young moose, numis wandered the verdant plains of vietnam, surviving only by digging up ancient pennies and using their lore and knowledge passed down by the wise mattholamew, he purchased the only thing he could - bubblegum. It is for this reason that the Numismatist must pass on bubblegum whenever offered, to save it for the Numis.

Though something was amiss. Numis felt the call of the homely fields of canadia and was drawn to the timber and majesty of that faraway place. On hot, humid nights he would dream of a land covered in snow, where the cold air would blow from the mountains and comfort him, soothing his soul. And so he set off, leaving his empty, tragic, money driven life behind in search of what he knew lay within his heart.

As he dreamed and as he ventured northward he encountered many a strange folk upon his periless treck. Some wanted to eat him, others the priceless substance of his antlers,some his rich, thick fur, and other still simply wanted help, but with each trial, with each tribulation his thoughts of the land of his dreams became stronger. Empowered by his experiences, made more vivid by each task, each challenge he completed. Until at last, he would reach his final and most arduous task.

There at the edge of the world, there lied a vast and unforgiving sea. A sea that extended beyond the reaches of sight and knowledge. But numis, knew in his heart that his dreams lay beyond this treacherous ocean. Numis stood there, on the shore for 12 days and nights battling within himself. as so, on the 13th day he entered those waters and swam. It is for this reason, that the number 13 shall be the numismatists lucky number, and you should curse allowed whenever a building omits it from their elevators. He swam as long and as hard as his will could muster through storms with unyeilding fury across miles untold. It is for this reason that Numismatists praise the moose god whenever they see large bodies of water.

strong was his body, sharp was his mind. but for all his power the sea remained endless. after 5 days a ceaseless travel numis was visited by a being he had never seen before a noodly being, one that smelled of the twinge of meat and overcooked pasta... and it said unto Numis, "why dost though expend thyself? I have been watching you, if you tun back now i can find you a place that soothes your heart"

numis did not stop, he was unsure of this great foreign monster. He was only sure of one things, the dreams of the place within his heart. He ignored the monster and continued his trek across the barren wasteland of the sea. On the 6th day, the beast returned, "If you do not turn back, young Numis, you will die. alone and cold, here amidst the waves. Allow me to take you to a place that will surely make your heart sing and your dreams be merry" the beast said.

But numis knew that there was only one place that could give him those things. and It was a place the existed only in his heart. that no other, not monster, beast or god could deliver him to the fields of his destiny.

And so he swam.

On the 7th day the beast returned a third time. "You must be getting tired, young Numis" the beast said mockingly. " I offer you salvation and happiness, come, allow me to take you to a lush land, filled with all the desires of your soul..."

This time, Numis stopped swimming.

The beast smiled and looked down, "Ahh, thank you, young one. You will be granted every desire you can and will ever wish." Numis wadded there for a moment, He closed his eyes, And his thoughts traveled once more back to the land of his dreams. The open, snowy plains, the lush pine forests, the cool wind blowing through the trees. The sun reflecting off the snow, the cold air showing the breath from his mouth, the smells of a verdant land, a good land.

His destiny.

Then at once he felt a power surge through him, his imagination giving him strength, feeding his emotions and empowering him to a strength immesureable! It is for this reason that the Numismatists uses his imagination frequently, ignores conventional logic, and hates spaghetti.

And like a rocket his flung himself from the water implaing the beast with his mighty horns! The beast screamed and reeled back, a gooey thick substance oozing from its gaping wounds. Before Numis realized what had happened, the beast vanished and numis fell back into that great, endless ocean and lost conciousness.

When numis next awoke he gasped for air and struggled against the strong current pulling him along. The great size of his antlers had saved numis in his unconcious state were keeping him afloat in the waters of the sea. As he regained his senses he began to take in his surroundings. As he turned his head back and forth to discern his direction he was suddenly lifted up and thrown violently downwards, carried along by the sea he was thrown into something...

an object, the first thing with solid mass he had felt for days. He kicked his legs and they found solid ground. Ss he gained his footing he pushed himself up and out of the tides looking forward he saw a most holy sight,

the land of his dreams lay before him.

every rock, tree, bird, and snowflake, exactly as he had pictured it on so many hot dreary nights. So filled with joy he walked upon the shore, and collapsed, smitten by pure joy and fullfillment in this land, his land, numis found others and told the tales of his travels. And by these stories and the majesty of his antlers the others came to understand numis, to draw from his stories and his strength.

and so they worshiped him and the things he had accomplished in the face of absolute adveristy. And there he spent the rest of his days, in the land of his dreams....


Numis passes his soul into the hearts of his followers and to all who make their pilgramidges to the holy land- canadia. Your connection with Numis appears as invisible, metaphysical antlers that grow with your power in Numismatology. Eldars of the church are said to have antlers so large, they can never leave their homes in fear of destroying surrounding buildings.

We have witnessed miracles of Numis in todays world. One such miracle was the mighty Jennifer. A moose of tiny size, but with antlers rivaling the largest beasts! So large were her antlers, that she required a unicycle to move, lest she would fall over. Jennifer is a testament to the will of Numis and the power of Numismatology. It is for this reason, that the chosen cycle of the Numismatologist is the unicycle.

Numismatists eat a manner of all things, but most widely is maple syrup and wood, for these are the fruits of the promiseland. It is also a common practice for Numismatists to play the holy game Street Fighter, and listen to techno music as it was departed from our Saint Mattholamew.

Numismatology is a constantly evolving religion as the words of Numis come to his prophets daily. There will be more updates.

Jennifer, Numis's Avatar.
If you keep the faith, maybe
your antlers could grow to be
as majestic as jennifers

The Church of Numis.

Brandon

he worships the holy god of the moose, numis

9:32pmWayne

lol

9:33pmBrandon

all hail numis!!

9:33pmWayne

hail numis!

lets start a moose woshiping cult

that sounds awesome

9:34pmBrandon

we need an epic story

9:34pmWayne

its true

9:34pmBrandon

one that reveals the weakness yet loving nature of all beings

and highlights the power inherent in the great mosse antlers

9:35pmWayne

hahhaha exactly

9:35pmBrandon

in fact, we should rip off auras and transform them into metaphysical antlers that every person has

their size, shape, and strength, reflective of that persons connection to numis himself

9:36pmWayne

I feel them already

9:36pmBrandon

the doors of our temples will have to be very wide

9:36pmWayne

lol, to allow for your metaphysical anttlers

9:37pmBrandon

DUDE!

9:37pmWayne

the higher standing with the church you have, the bigger your antlers

9:37pmBrandon

think of the hats we could make!

9:37pmWayne

LOL

9:37pmBrandon

oh man were talking bells, tassels, the possibilities are endless!!

9:37pmWayne

and we could get a pet moose

I wonder if we spent years cross breading and doing selective breeding, if we could make a mini-moose

9:38pmBrandon

we could call it a miracle to galvanize our cause

9:39pmWayne

hahaha all religions need miracles!

9:39pmBrandon

noone would dare question its validity

9:39pmWayne

ours will be a small moose

9:39pmBrandon

with fucking huge antlers

9:39pmWayne

LOL

like so big it cant walk without help

its got little unicycles with stands to help him go

9:40pmBrandon

GENIUS!

9:40pmWayne

lol that would look so retarded

I love it

I think ill draw it

9:41pmBrandon

then go forth! bring to life the hope and dreams of a new following!

and pray to our lord and god, the great Numis for the inspiration to create his image!

9:46pmWayne

there you have it

perfection

9:46pmBrandon

as only the image of numis would be

i wish you had a scanner

9:47pmWayne

I just uploaded it son

check my page holmes!

9:47pmBrandon

LOL

photo taken in canada

oh excuse me'

canadia

9:47pmWayne

precisely

9:47pmBrandon

its....

BEAUTIFUL

almost to the point that my face melts off

9:48pmWayne

i know. i cried drawing it

9:48pmBrandon

those sprial eyes...they show the mysticism and wisdom within...

9:48pmWayne

lol

9:49pmBrandon

and sweet christ the unicycle holding up the antlers is fantastic

9:49pmWayne

i know. so lifelike

9:49pmBrandon

i seriously lol every time i look at it

9:49pmWayne

took me seconds. I couldn't bear to ever repeat the daunting task

9:50pmBrandon

nor should it ever be repeated

the moment of enlightening inspiration has culminated in this...

9:50pmWayne

lightning doesnt strike twice

9:51pmBrandon

you named our minimoose jennifer?

i like it.

9:52pmWayne

yup. thought it was classic moose

9:53pmBrandon

lol mighty jennifer's antlers

9:54pmWayne

lol im totally posting this on my blog

9:55pmBrandon

im totally declaring myself an apostle of numis.